The Best Signs in the World!

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

In a Podiatrist's office: 

"Time wounds all heels."

On a Septic Tank Truck in  
Oregon:

"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels" 

On a Septic Tank Truck:

"We're #1 in the #2 business."

At a Proctologist's door: 

"To expedite your visit please back in."

On a Plumber's truck:

"We repair what your husband fixed." 

On a Plumber's truck:

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.."

Pizza Shop Slogan: 

"7 days without pizza makes one weak."

At a Tire Shop in  
Milwaukee:

"Invite us to your next blowout."

On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:

"Hello. Can we pick your nose?" 

At a Towing company:

"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

On an Electrician's truck: 

"Let us remove your shorts."

In a Nonsmoking Area:

"If we see smoke, we will assume you are 

on fire and take appropriate action."

On a Maternity Room door:

"Push. Push. Push."

At an Optometrist's Office :

"If you don't see what you're looking for, 

you've come to the right place."

On a Taxidermist's window:

"We really know our stuff."

On a Fence:

"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive." 

At a Car Dealership:

"The best way to get back on your feet - 

miss a car payment."

Outside a Muffler Shop:

"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

At the Electric Company:

"We would be delighted if you send in your payment.  

However, if you don't, you will be."

In a Restaurant window:

"Don't stand there and be hungry, 

Come on in and get fed up." 

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

At a Propane Filling Station, 

"Thank heaven for little grills."

At a  
Chicago Radiator Shop:

"Best place in town to take a leak."

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